Offline Fortuna

  • *
  • Posts: 2075
    • View Profile
Re: Now Playing (the Video Game Version)
« Reply #960 on: May 20, 2020, 02:46:26 AM »
I recently finished the FF VII Remake. Saddam forced me to watch the review by Dunkey, who aside from a nails-on-chalkboard kind of voice is mostly accurate in his review so I won't bother rehashing it. Except the combat system is garbage and anyone who disagrees is wrong.

I am playing through the original FF VII again. In reflection on the remake, I mostly enjoy all of the extra exposition and backstories, I just hate how tedious is it to progress through the game to get to those moments.

I'm sure I have more to say, but I guess I'll release it in two additional installments over the next five years.

Anyone who doesn’t like dunkey is wrong.
R.I.P. To my boy 4Chainz. You trill to da end.


Offline honk

  • *
  • Posts: 1819
  • resident goose
    • View Profile
Re: Now Playing (the Video Game Version)
« Reply #961 on: May 29, 2020, 03:31:05 AM »
Dark Messiah of Might and Magic

At first glance, this game looks to be generic fantasy bullshit. And it is. But under the bland surface, there's one of the best first-person combat systems I've ever experienced. The core hack-and-slash mechanics are fluid and responsive, and the emphasis is less on smacking enemies aside through brute force and more on slipping past their defenses while making sure they can't get past yours. Direct confrontations demand your full attention. The bulk of the enemies you'll face are competent enough to fend off most blows unless they've first been staggered or thrown off guard, and they can take quite a beating before they go down for good. There are a number of different weapons you can switch between to give you the edge in any given scenario - swords for more power, daggers for more speed, staves for crowd control, etc. - and offensive magic in the form of fire, ice, and lightning spells, but taking on enemies in direct, fair fights remains very challenging.

So what you really should do instead is take advantage of the ludicrous physics and your overpowered kick. Dark Messiah makes terrific use of Valve's Source engine and ensures that every enemy encounter takes place in a sandbox for you to slaughter your foes in a number of different hilarious and very satisfying ways. You can use your ice magic on the ground and watch your enemies slip on them like a cartoon and tumble either into a chasm or onto the ground where you can quickly finish them off. You can pick up objects and throw them at enemies to stagger them, or use telekinesis to do it from across the room. You can cut the supports to ledges and watch them collapse and dump everything on them onto your unsuspecting enemies' heads. You can cut the ropes holding up chandeliers or other pendulums and send them swinging into enemies. You can destroy weak floors as enemies walk on them and watch them crash to the floor before. And most importantly of all, you can kick. By itself, the kick briefly staggers enemies, but whenever there's anything of interest behind them, it suddenly becomes far more powerful and launches them backwards. You can kick enemies into spike racks and watch them instantly be impaled. You can kick them into campfires and watch them burst into flame. Kick them into chasms, into deep water, into each other, down stairs, off ledges, you name it. Really, this whole fucking game is about you using your rocket-powered kicks to kill everyone in the most ridiculous ways possible.

Unfortunately, there really isn't anything else in this game to recommend it beyond the wonderful combat and physics. The story is bland and dumb, the voice acting is hammy and annoying, and I especially don't like the level design, which is repetitive and frustrating, and many times left me wondering exactly what I was supposed to be doing to advance. This is one game that would have benefited from adding quest markers, as more often than not the key to advancing turns out to be activating a needle-in-a-haystack lever or switch that you had no idea you were even meant to be looking for in the first place. Dark Messiah isn't a particularly great game, but for me it was saved by the combat. If you're willing to slog through some dull dungeon crawls to get to the good stuff, I'd recommend giving this a try.

Spec Ops: The Line

A passable cover shooter with a remarkably ambitious story that's largely a riff on Apocalypse Now - and yes, it is Apocalypse Now that's clearly the inspiration, not fucking Heart of Darkness. Maybe they thought they could get in legal trouble if they admitted their source wasn't public domain, but whatever. I give the story an A for effort, but large sections of the plot don't really make sense, the tone can get preachy and pretentious at times, and the scripting of the terrible deeds that occur at your hands is so obvious that it was impossible for me to feel any real guilt or responsibility for them. It's like the game gives you a gun, tells you to shoot a specific person, and then when you shoot them it tells you that actually that person was innocent and so you should feel bad. It's a little more nuanced than that, but it's the same general idea. There needs to be some player agency if these consequences are going to resonate. Some RPGs have managed to guilt-trip me in the past, particularly the Fallout games (the good ones) and the Witcher series, but it doesn't work for a game this heavily scripted.
ur retartet but u donut even no it and i walnut tell u y

Re: Now Playing (the Video Game Version)
« Reply #962 on: June 24, 2020, 02:15:16 AM »
now playing rimworld. my crew slings space drugs to neighboring space cities.
I have visited from prestigious research institutions of the highest caliber, to which only our administrator holds with confidence.


Offline junker

  • Planar Moderator
  • *****
  • Posts: 9147
    • View Profile
Re: Now Playing (the Video Game Version)
« Reply #963 on: June 26, 2020, 06:47:53 PM »
I just finished L.A. Noire

What a dogshit ending that ruins most of the time spent on the game.