Whoa, just hold on a second. You need to parse these ideas in smaller, more manageable discussable chunks. We can’t have a good online discussion otherwise - it becomes impractical to address everything as it tangents off from a wall of text.
Let me reorganise a bit, and please reply with your thoughts again.
1. Gravity as a force vs gravity as a deformation of space time.
Okay. The two don’t work in the same discussion together. We can talk about Newtonian gravity, which works well in the regime of the weak field limit. That is, GR reduces to Newton very well on the surface of the earth.
The normal force is the Newton’s 3rd law pair. When I stand on the ground, the gravitational force acts down. So why don’t I move down? Cause the ground is there. Obviously. But since f=ma and my a is zero when standing, there must be a force which counteracts gravity. That is the normal force. It is the force of the ground on me that stops me sinking through it.
What keeps you on your feet while standing over a concrete slab? It is not any "normal force", it is purely density of mass holding your sliding toward the space deformation. Of course that if you relax your muscles you will fall over the concrete, space deformation will slide you down, if the soil under the concrete slab becomes less dense, it will slide sinking into the soil (Florida have several sink holes to prove it). The sliding vector is always present, trying to move you towards the stronger deformation, there is no way to avoid it. There is no force at all, there is only space deformation, less dense property of the space.
There is no force holding the book over the table, the space deformation generated by the huge mass of the planet is trying to slide the book down, but the table is just holding it there. A "force" require some energy in first place. One explanation of force:
"strength or energy as an attribute of physical action or movement". Now, think the whole planet and all over it, including the table and the book were in space floating, very apart, by molecules, and slowing all of it slide towards a common center with little space with less density, it took millions of years to do that. Where that huge "force" that pushed everything together comes from? what about the huge force that holds all the tectonic plates over the melting ball of lava comes from? What generated such huge amount of energy? It is much easier to think about a space density becoming smaller, mass sliding towards where it is less dense, some mass can't go ahead because something is in the way, a table for example.
"Force" is a simple and easy way to explain in layman terms what we barely understand.
I hear it everyday, "the force of gravity"... it is not.
Force is when I push a chair, there is a muscle mechanic action, based on energy, it promotes a new vector to the balanced space around the chair, it moves. That is force, because it was not there before, it was generated, used and converted. A car's engine piston moves by the force of the fuel exploding, such energy can be wasted. Gravity is not generated, imposed, used or wasted, you can not, because it is not a force. You can convert the potential energy stored in the hydroelectric water, but it is not a force offered by gravity. The solar energy evaporated all that water and transferred energy to it - well, not really, the water didn't change, you can not measure such energy, but it is there, in a "potential" way, it means, "it potentially can be used". Gravity is just the slider where the water runs and allows the turbines and generators to extract such energy. Gravity sliding action will still the same after the water energy is collected, before, while and after. If it can not be changed, converted or wasted, it is not a force.
Cheers.